Manny Pacquiao is this generation's Roberto Duran and Aerial Telly is this generation's Ace Rothstein, Giacomo Casanova and George Orwell combined

Don't you ever listen?

"I didn't have to count" Kenny Bayless

"Hatton will knock him out with a body shot in round two!!!" said a fat boy to Aerial Telly in one of his watering holes a month ago. "Fuck you, fat man" came the response from history's greatest boxing handicapper. "De La Hoya was washed up! Hatton's never been beaten at 140! C'mon Ricky!!!!!" said an Internet chode, a while later. "Choke on cock, keyboard warrior" the notorious poonhound shot back. "He's moving his head more. Mayweather has made him a new fighter! There's only oooooooone Ricky Hatton!!!!!" said a two-fights-a-year Sentanta subscribing fairweather fight fan snatch. "Wallow in your filth, dilettante" said the greatest television critic the world has ever seen. And at the MGM Grand last night Manny Pacquiao, the Mexecutioner, the greatest fighter that ever lived delivered a two-round display of such brutality it is certain to traumatise those who witnessed it for life. Aerial Telly saw it coming which is more than can be said for many in the betting and boxing communities. The lifeless corpse of Ricky Hatton was dragged from the ring by the ankles, his head banging on each of the steps that led out of the arena one by one, his shorts bunched around his knees revealing his miniscule ivory winkie and shrivelled ginger nutsack, as the huge British contingent looked on slack-jawed in docile silence. Which made a welcome fucking change.

"The lifeless corpse of Ricky Hatton was dragged from the ring by his ankles, his head banging on each of the steps that led out of the arena one by one as the huge British contingent looked on slack-jawed in docile silence. Which made a welcome fucking change."

One can't overstate the sensational ass fucking handed out to Richard John Hatton by Emmanuel Dapidran Pacquiao. He was on Ricky Hatton from the opening bell with superior speed, timing and power. After dropping Hatton twice in the first, he dominated the second before knocking Hatton out with a left that almost decapitated him. Referee Kenny Bayless dispensed with the count, stopped the fight and declared Hatton deceased at 2:59 of the second round. Hatton did not give a post fight interview on account of being dead.

"Mayweather turning up for every training session late and generally pissing about sowing hatred where there was love like a reverse Saint Francis of Assisi. Fucking crackhead."

Many felt it was an intriguing match up but the truth is that the Hitman was dead the moment he signed the contract. He leaves behind a fiancee, a large house and a gigantic following of fans who know nothing about boxing. He was terrific for the profile of the sport, was the best 10 stone fighter in the world and most of all was a stand-up guy. He will be missed.

Manny Pacquiao though is in a different league - a different league to everyone. He is as good for boxing as it is possible for a human being to be. Ferocious, talented, committed and an authentically down-to-earth cool guy. Aerial Telly was particularly pleased for Pacquiao's trainer Freddie Roach given his obvious deterioration. Parkinson's is taking a greater hold of the Pacman's mentor yet he still utterly outclassedFloyd Mayweather snr and you have to ask exactly how seriously Mayweather took this fight, turning up for every training session late and generally pissing about, causing friction in the camp, sowing hatred where there was love like a reverse Saint Francis of Assisi. Fucking crackhead.

"After the 49th murder of his career, Manny Pacquiao once again confounded the critics and proved beyond any reasonable doubt that he is the greatest fighter that ever lived"

Any old road, after the 49th murder of his career, Manny Pacquiao once again confounded the critics and proved beyond any reasonable doubt that he is the greatest fighter that ever lived.

And Aerial Telly STAY making money, STAY saying where it's at and STAY tapping your girl right under your very nose.

Imagined: 3rd May 2009